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| 1st || Black Cat || (Caroline) |
| 2nd || Hummingbird || (Jo) |
| 3rd || Professor || (Ben) |
| 4th || Boy Plunger || (Ian) |
| 5th || Hustler || (Adam) |
| 6th || Poker Pirate || (Jamesie) |
| 7th || Exocet || (Paul) |
| 8th || Five Fingers || (Ot) |
| 9th || DOG || (Carol) |
| 10th || Real Deal || (Dan) |
Prize fund: £5.00 each - total first prize £50.00
Game Length: 7.30pm - 10.45pm 3 hours 15 mins
Rules: Texas Hold'em
Two tables (5 persons)
Antes double every 30 mins until 21.50pm. Tables merge. Antes then double every 20 mins.
Venue: Poker Joker Card Room
Qualifiers - Professor, Hustler, Hummingbird
Out - Five Fingers, Real Deal
Qualifiers - Exocet, Poker Pirate, Boy Plunger, Black Cat
Out - Exocet
The poker was dirty tonight, the atmosphere loud, brash and downright abusive. The key culprits return with the Professor and Boy Plunger using slow slow play and verbal warfare to put their opponents on tilt. The effect is highlighted under the tight ante conditions and a number of players return the volleys. Some strong dealing is needed by the Real Deal to silence the offenders, who continue their tirade long after their chip stacks have been cracked. The quality of poker is high regardless and only the strongest could survive tonights inferno. A reminder notice will be coming regarding poker etiquette.
The Black Cat wins her first game, a ranking event. Her whiskers were unruffled by the testosterone charged banter. Her cards reduce the gentlemen of poker to pregnant doging about short antes and bad beats. The level playing field of poker cannot be argued against. Virtually down and out when the tables merged, doubles up a few times and waits for the time to pounce. In the final game, the Cat gets the cream. Its been coming a long time but a famous victory in difficult conditions is first class. Obvious delight gives way to open celebration in the face of the poker boys. Respect.
The Hummingbird places second. Shes finished reading the second half of the book and unhinges the minds of her players by calculating odds during the game. This leads to some wild plays, notably against Five Fingers. Playing the percentages comes up trumps and at the merge stage the Hummingbird is an unexpected chip leader. Developing a healthy respect amongst the poker fraternity, a raise is a definate Bird scarer and leads to rapid folding. Not slow to flutter her wings in delight. On the perch of greatness?
The Professor is mad. He's mad about the stake money, mad about the antes, mad about his cards and mad about the injustice of it all. Outrageous slowplay unsettles the majority of the table. Three hands played in 20 minutes, not in any small part due to the Professor playing mind games (folded every time). Still in a strong vein of form though, gaining another ranking point. The evening ends with the Professor still toiling loudly with his poker demons. Staggered by a Black cat mauling.
The Boy Plunger is bored. Pre-merge he is vocal about the inaction on his table. A suspected psycological ploy as his attempts to 'lose' his chips result in a healthy chip stack at the final table. The Professor and Plunger draw seats next to each other at the final table and the verbals double in intensity and the play is slow motion. Strike the motion bit, you have to move for that. The mind games and slow play have always been part of the Plungers arsenal and but his spurs need sharpening. In the absence of gambing, gamesmanship is his only weapon.
The Hustler has an evening of mixed fortunes. Bleeds chips in the early stages but doubles up and qualifies for the final table. A definate style of play may offer reading opportunities for the bravest poker foes. Feigns weakness and strength making any call a gamble. The Hustler is out again just inches from poker points and rues his lack of aggression on the night. Quick antes require bold moves early and the Hustler can't make his cards count. Muscled out.
The Poker Pirate is stressed. For a plunderer the slow play is like a long stretch in the ships brigg. His emotions can't be controlled and despite making it to the final table, his chip ships are sunk under the weight of bigger guns. On a poor run of form since his first win. A non-drinker this evening, one can only imagine what the hostile environment must have been like on a coca cola night. Looking for the etiquette to be tightened before leaving dock again.
The Exocet is back. After a lengthy absence due to a new arrival, the poker missile returns. His poker is not too rusty and final table beckons. Deals with the disruption well. Unfortunately, his targeting is off on the night and he proves the theory that he is more firework than firepower. One pop and he's out. Back in the poker world and no doubt will return with more poker powder in his rifle.
Five Fingers is stunned and shaken. Plays a solid game for an hour, accumulating a nice chip stack with some medium strength hands. Finally pulls a good set of cowboys and slow plays it nicely. The flop brings...
Qh 10c 2s
Five Fingers goes all in hoping for a big call. The Professor bows in the face of aggression but the Hummingbird calls with...
Five Fingers can smell a ranking win already and the table are amazed at this crazy call. The Hummingbird flutters her wings and says she could afford a call and liked the odds. Unbelievably fourth street and the river are...
... the straight is made and Fingers is given the bird by one of the bravest calls in the history of Poker Jokers. Five Fingers needs a calculator to keep up with this mathematical magic. Concedes to the better player on the night.
The DOG doesnt really get out of the kennel let alone go poker walkies. Loses a large portion of bonios to her nemisis the Boy Plunger early on and never recovers. Impounded. Takes defeat well and sits in the girls corner for the rest of the evening. Her obvious delight at the girls glory cannot be disguised. Women in Poker would be proud.
The Real Deal proves that this ranking game has been turned on it's head. The three leading points scorers are first out tonight. The Real Deal is fatally wounded on the first hand, with A8 unsuited being beaten by A10 unsuited in Five Fingers. Half a stack is too little to make a move and the Real Deal is out. Looks a strong contender for the title with a 6 point lead with two games left. They think it's all over, it isn't yet... as we all know, poker has a habit of creeping up and biting you on the arse.
Great game tonight everyone, even with the pyschology in full flow. Its part of the game no doubt, but a balance is needed you dodgy geezers. Don't lend the women any books!