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Big Dog
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Ranking 2: Love (Rat) Hurts
« on: February 5th, 2005, 10:23am »
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1st Love Rat
2nd Super Flash
3rd Candyman
4th Skywalker
5th Professor
6th Five Fingers
7th Braveheart
8th DOG
9th Hummingbird
10th Black Cat
11th The Viking
12th Poker Pirate
13th Exocet
14th Poker Shark
15th The Fish

Ranking game 2 sees a big field take to the tables. New antes ensure the game is fast and furious as the blinds double on each table as people are knocked out. A return to taking quotes from vanquished players shows that poker poetry is not dead... a new record surely for the number of river card saves in an evening, proving that AK is a terrible hand (?!!).

Qualifying Table 1
Love Rat
Black Cat
Five Fingers
The Fish
Poker Shark

Qualifying Table 2

The Viking
Poker Pirate

Chip Count at Final Table:

121 Love Rat
316 Super Flash
34 Candyman
96 Skywalker
90 Professor
93 Five Fingers

The Love Rat plays a blinder as Hells Kitchen take the honours again. Beats the Superflash heads up to be the man in form going to Vegas. Always the gentleman, even gave Professor a free chip to avert a dispute. His poker is not so nice as he blasts all before him and shows that Love really does hurt.

"I felle like ot one up my urgeupss my tits in my eyes!"

(this is what i wrote... i suspect the Stella may have disconnected by hand from my ears at this point in the night, sorry Love Rat!)


Superflash has slaughtered his qualifying table and comes to the final with half the chips in play and no small sprinkling of confidence. Shows AK four times in the final but loses three of these battles. Had the cards but against fearless opponents, comes up short in the showdowns.

"I can't believe it!"


Candyman arrives at the final table with a gob stopper and a couple of sweet wrappers. Sweet run of play sees the Candyman double up time and time again as his fearless all in's pay up. Placing 3rd an unexpect bonus surely. Always in the running.



Skywal ker is our most consistant performer this season, placing in the top four in both games. Looks as if he has turned to the dark side, using Jedi mind tricks a plenty as he draws a call from the Professor. (Table talk "I can't win". Shows a full house!). Weak minded people watch out! In danger of becoming the nearly man.

"I like they biscuits."


Professor picks up a point and makes the final table again. Plays well and is clearly doing something right. Just can't seem to stay with the big guns when the antes are high and adrenalin is part of the currency. Too cautious maybe. In danger of making up the numbers?



Fiv e Fingers is riding high on the novelty of being on the final table. Takes a huge hit from the Candyman first hand losing AK to A6. Mortally wounded his chip stack makes a brief comeback (beating a Superflash AK with an A7 river card spade flush) but the false dawn is soon snuffed out.

"Just glad to be here!"


7 Braveheart
"Och ay the loser."

"Good game."

9 Hummingbird
"No! I travelled 3 hours for this!"

10 Black Cat
"Fu*k off"

11 The Viking
"Not as good as you sucking my c*ck after the Pirates."

12 Poker Pirate
"I feel better than I did when you sucked my c*ck last night"

13 Exocet
"Wheres my fu*king badge?!"

14 Poker Shark
"Fu*king annoyed!"
Loses AK to A10.

15 The Fish

Thanks for coming everyone.

Team Headlines:

Hells Kitchen on fire.
The Fishbowl in crisis.
Poker Jokers are B list.
Pirate Ship X rated.
Women in Poker are girls.

« Last Edit: September 15th, 2009, 4:08pm by Big Dog » Logged
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